Well, kiddos, not much of an introduction to be had this week, except to say that we’re continuing the presentation of our first ever mini-series here at the club. This is one of those great examples of a story writing itself, because I had all sorts of ideas of what might go on in the second installment, but when I sat down to write it, things just started happening and . . . Well, you’ll see.
Apologies in advance to all our carrier pigeon fans out there. We may meet in another life, but not again in this one. (Translation: he ain’t in the story anymore. And perhaps I’ve watched THE DARK CRYSTAL too many times.)
Subject: JIM AND JYM part II (story #11)
Date: Mon, 5 Sep 94 17:08:39 EDT
BRO-MAN’S STORY OF THE WEEK
Well, well, well. And well. Here we are for the second installment of the new season. The week has gone by so quickly, hasn’t it? Time marches on, you know? There’s no way to stop it. I mean, we could just send out part one of the JIM AND JYM story again, and pretend that time wasn’t marching on, and it was still last week, but that would just be silly, and no one would believe it anyway. And then no one would read the story, either. Who thinks up these dumb ideas?
Anyway, so it’s time for part two of our story. For those of you who may not remember what the stores even are from week to week, not that I think ANY of my readers could possibly forget these thrilling stories in a mere week’s time or anything, nope, nope nope, you might wanna re-read last week’s installment just to freshen up your memories. But, hey, maybe not. I mean, heck, I’m not gonna.
JIM AND JYM AND THE TREASURE OF THE BIG MOUNTAIN
Jim looked out the window of the airplane. Below them white, billowy clouds stretched away infinitely. Well, they probably ended somewhere, but gosh darn if he could see where.
Across the aisle, Jym was snoring peacefully. He was dreaming about goats. Don’t ask me why.
Jim scratched his chin and thought about Maurice. Just a day or so before, they had gotten a cryptic message from Maurice, who was vacationing in Borneo on the super saver econo plan AirBorneo dream vacation package. This included a flight to Borneo (one way, you had to find some other way to go home, that’s part of the reason it was so cheap), three nights stay at the glamourous Hotel Borneo in downtown Borneo square, just nights, not days, it was a shoe factory from 9 to 5, and three meals. Not three meals a day, or anything, just three meals. Maurice wasn’t very good at planning vacations, and his travel agent didn’t like him very much. So anyway, this message indicated to Jim and Jym that Maurice was in some kind of trouble (see how I’m recapping in case you forgot something from last time?), and they had hurried to catch a flight to Borneo. Of course, on such short notice, they hadn’t been able to grab a domestic flight or anything, so they were flying AirAardvark, the airline of people who can’t get real flights.
Suddenly, there was a crackling sound above Jim’s head and the captain’s voice came over the loudspeaker. Jym awoke with a start. This surprised him, because he hadn’t had a start when he got on the plane.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” the captain said, as though there was anyone on the plane beside Jim and Jym, “if you look out your windows, you will see that we are approaching Borneo.” Jim and Jym looked out their windows, and, indeed, the island was just ahead. “However,” the captain continued, “I’ve just hit my head on the control panel pretty hard, and, well, I’ve completely forgotten how to fly. So, I apologize if the landing is a little rough.” A moment later Jim and Jym, still looking out their windows, saw the captain leap from the plane with a parachute strapped to his back.
“Well,” said JIm, “that kind of sucks.”
“I’ll say,” said Jym, “I was having a swell dream.”
“So, what should we do now?” Jim asked, beginning to pout.
“Hey, now,” said Jym, getting up and putting his hand on Jim’s shoulder, “don’t be a grumpy-face, pal! We’ll think of something! We’re smart! We’re resourceful! We’re the stars of the story!”
“Okay,” said Jim, brightening, “um, let’s see. Are there any more parachutes around?”
They separated, and after a hurried search, they found that all the parachutes were gone. Actually, they found that there hadn’t been any parachutes in the plane to begin with, and the captain had apparently jumped out with a fire extinguisher strapped to his back.
“Well, this certainly bodes ill,” Jim observed as he stood alone in the cockpit. Jym walked up behind him and pulled something out of his pocket.
“Would this help?” Jym asked, giving Jim a start.
Jim turned around. “Don’t do that!” he said, “you scared me.”
“Oh, sorry,” said Jym.
“So, what are we gonna do now?” Jim wailed, stamping his foot. Of course, this hurt a lot since a carrier pigeon had put a sign through it just a few days before.
“Well, let’s see,” said Jym, thinking quickly, “maybe we can land the plane.”
Jim stopped caressing his bandaged foot and looked at Jym as though he was crazy. “Are you crazy?” he asked.
“Look,” said Jym, pointing at the control panel, “there’s a flight manual right there. I bet we could do it. We’re quick and resourceful, and we think on our feet, and the heroes can’t die in part two of a three part story.”
“Okay,” said Jim, “it’s worth a shot.”
Just then, the plane crashed into a mountain and blew up.
TO BE CONTINUED
Well, there it is, kiddies. Honestly, I expected this installment to be a lot longer, and have more action in it, but, hey, when the characters take on a life of their own and go in a different direction than you’d planned. . . Well, kill ‘em. We’ll see how I get myself out of this one next week. It should be fun. Yes, I am saying that just to reassure myself.